VOLUME 3

“LOVE AND FAMILY”

Olivia O’Brien “Care Less More”

Care Less More by Olivia O’Brien is a song that has been more recently relatable in my life. Now that I am 22, I have had numerous new experiences with boys and relationships. Being a single girl in her Twenties has made me realize how I have had similar instances with guys who aren’t really looking to be in a committed relationship. This song tells a story of a boy and a girl who are playing games and they aren’t quite sure of what they want from each other. I always thought that I wanted and needed a boyfriend, but I found that I can’t force things. A relationship has to come natural and the timing has to be right. Meeting new people and being able to “date around” has helped me determine what I want out of my future relationship. The more people that I develop a relationship with throughout my life, the more I will learn about my own identity as a friend, daughter, girlfriend, mother, and wife.

Michael Jackson “You are Not Alone”

The more I feel independent, the more I also feel like I am on my own. Michael Jackson’s “You are not alone” reminds me that the true relationships in my life will stay with me through thick and thin. The support of my friends and family have helped me develop my music, graduate college, get through my own insecurities, and made me enjoy life. Without my family, I would be lost as to who I am and what I want to accomplish throughout my lifespan. As said from the article, Introduction toward an integrative identity, family is an “agent” for identity development. My own family have taught me how to be a compassionate, fun-loving, positive, and self-less person.

Post Malone “Feeling Whitney”

“I’ve been looking for someone to put up with my bullshit.” I hold this lyric close to my heart since I love the blunt meaning behind it. This phrase displays a very real and relatable concept, especially within my love life. Throughout my years, I haven’t truly had a serious relationship, but I am waiting for the moment when I will be able to fully let my guard down with someone. I will know when a guy is really meant to be with me, when he can accept me for who I am with all of the “bullshit” or “baggage” that I may bring. I don’t think that anybody needs someone else to make themselves feel complete, but when you can find the person to put up with all your issues, you feel a sense of love and belonging. The construction of one’s identity is guided by discrete motives, with one of them being the feeling of belonging.

Halsey “Bad at Love”

To this day, Halsey has been one of the female artist that I admire the most, due to her sound as well as her beautiful lyrics. “Bad at Love” tells the stories of different relationships that went awry. In my life, I have the same sense with some of my relationships that I have had in the past. Sometimes I feel like I am not suited for love, since I have never has a serious “love” and I also think that if I have not been able to fully open up with someone before, will I ever be able to? My identity is not determined by another person, but it is definitely shaped by the relationships that I create. Being able to find your best friend that you also can fall in love with and share a life with is something that I have always wanted. Not in the sense, that I need it to feel complete, but it also leads me to be a committed friend, girlfriend, and maybe even potential wife. Identifying as a wife or father, boyfriend or girlfriend, is something that is socially constructed.

Ruth B. “Mixed Signals”

The song “Mixed Signals” is all about the unknown in a relationship and the point in time when you aren’t quite sure on where it is heading. There have been instances in my lifetime where a relationship of mine had been strictly friends, and I potentially could see it being more. In that moment, I was too nervous and scared to be turned down to even talk about a future with him. From this experience, I have grown to learn that I need to be open and honest with my feelings, even if I am afraid to be denied. Everybody wants to feel wanted and when they don’t, it hurts the most. The feeling of acceptance and belonging is what most people strive for. According to the article called The Effect of Social Media on Identity Construction, “the individual needs others in order to establish himself/herself.”